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DRIP, DRIP, DRIP

In a ceremony carrying all the suspense of the official ribbon-cutting of a supermarket that has been open to shoppers for three months, journalists dutifully convened at Wembley on Friday to confirm that the England Geopolitics World Cup squad leaked into the public domain on Thursday was definitely the same as the one that was actually picked. Having been “exclusively” revealed by various hacks, Mr 15%s, Harry Maguire and assorted members of his family, the most contentious decisions appear to have been those made by Thomas Tuchel to leave Maguire, Cole Palmer and Phil Foden at home. “I’ve been left shocked and gutted by the decision,” parped the Manchester United defender, who had been told he was no higher than fifth in the centre-back pecking order. “Absolute [sic] disgusted,” clucked his mum on a Social Media Disgrace, before one of his brothers also joined the pile-on.

Of course, for every reserve defender left out, one must be included. The presence of the more versatile Big Dan Burn and Jarell Quansah in Tuchel’s squad were bones of public contention. Elsewhere on the bench, calls for Djed Spence and Ivan Toney prompted meltdowns in certain quarters, as did the ruthless “snubs” to which the likes of Lewis Hall, Luke Shaw, Trent Alexander-Arnold, Morgan Gibbs-White, Jarrod Bowen and Adam Wharton were subjected. While each of the excluded players is perfectly entitled to feel frustrated, the fact remains that Tuchel was inevitably going to get no end of pelters no matter which 26 he picked. Luckily, the German has always struck Football Daily as the kind of man who could not give two hoots what @SelhurstBunchOfNumbers, some performatively shouty Sky Sports News reporter or Foden’s plumber think.

“I am very confident in the group that we chose,” soothed Tuchel. “The best possible team is not necessarily the 26 most talented names. We had to leave some extraordinary talents, some extraordinary personalities, at home. If we had picked all these names, some other big five names would have been out and we would be talking about [them] now. It comes with difficult and hard choices in the buildup to the tournament.” What many of those comically losing the plot over Tuchel’s selections don’t seem to realise is that in a 26-man squad, where several members will get little or no game time, the importance of having a few well-liked, low-maintenance fringe players who have leadership qualities or are simply good craic cannot be overstated. While there are no standout candidates for the official Conor Coady role of vibes man in a cloistered and often boring environment for up to – no chuckles at the back, please – seven weeks, it is to be hoped Jordan Henderson has increased his repertoire of card tricks.

As is customary, in a day or two when the dust settles and discourse that has bordered on the hysterical moves on from the “snubbed” to the “selected”, critics of Tuchel’s recruitment policy might accept that despite the absence of several big-name players, England’s squad actually looks pretty decent. As they prepare to embark on another crusade fuelled by entitlement and existential dread, England will do so under the stewardship of a head coach with a commendable reluctance to be dazzled by big reputations. “I can assure every fan in the country we have 26 players who are 100% committed and know their role, and are committed to the idea of team spirit and being unselfish,” parped the German. Despite having given England fans what they have long been crying out for, Tuchel will be unsurprised to learn that huge numbers of them are more unhappy than ever.

England’s GWC squad:
Goalkeepers: Jordan Pickford (Everton), Dean Henderson (Crystal Palace), James Trafford (Manchester City).
Defenders: Reece James (Chelsea), Tino Livramento (Newcastle), Marc Guéhi (Manchester City), Ezri Konsa (Aston Villa), John Stones (Manchester City), Jarell Quansah (Bayer Leverkusen), Nico O’Reilly (Manchester City), Dan Burn (Newcastle), Djed Spence (Tottenham Hotspur).
Midfielders: Declan Rice (Arsenal), Elliot Anderson (Nottingham Forest), Jude Bellingham (Real Madrid), Morris … [Snip – Football Daily Ed], Jordan Henderson (Brentford), Morgan Rogers (Aston Villa), Kobbie Mainoo (Manchester United), Eberechi Eze (Arsenal).
Forwards: Harry Kane (Bayern Munich), Ivan Toney (Al-Ahli), Ollie Watkins (Aston Villa), Bukayo Saka (Arsenal), Noni Madueke (Arsenal), Marcus Rashford (Barcelona), Anthony Gordon (Newcastle).

QUOTE OF THE DAY

“What a time we have had together. Don’t ask me the reasons I’m leaving. There is no reason, but deep inside, I know it’s my time. Nothing is eternal, if it was, I would be here. Eternal will be the feeling, the people, the memories, the love I have for my Manchester City. This is a city built from work. From graft. You see it in the colour of the bricks. From people who clocked in early, stayed late. The factories. The Pankhursts. The unions. The music. Simply the Industrial Revolution and how this changed the world. And I think I grew to understand that, and my teams did too. We worked. We suffered. We fought. And we did things our own way. Our way … Tony Walsh said in his unforgettable poem this is the place. I’m sorry, Tony: this is my place. Noel [Gallagher] … I was right. It has been so [eff]ing fun. Love you all” – Pep Guardiola takes a free-jazz approach to finally confirming that he will leave Manchester City on Sunday, when the club will name the new North Stand after him. Here’s Will Unwin on the Pep years at City and Jonathan Wilson on how Gurdiola changed football.

FOOTBALL DAILY LETTERS

It is Thursday evening (BST) and Big Website has a story about how Harry Maguire, Phil Foden and Cole Palmer et al have been left out of England’s GWC squad to be announced on Friday morning by Thomas Tuchel. Such prescience could be extended to announcing the competition winners and free up a month of football-watching and ultimate disappointment when England don’t win” – Nigel Sanders.

Is anyone else sick of seeing photos of Andy Burnham out running in his vintage Everton shirt? If so, he’s got a lot of work to do to unite the Hafnias and the Hafnia-nots” – Phil Taverner.

With so much of the news coverage featuring the tree which is of insufficient girth to conceal a Southampton intern, I’m concerned that it might become a place of pilgrimage for Middlesborough fans should they win the playoffs, and that might provoke disgruntled Southampton supporters to do a ‘Sycamore Gap’ job on it. Time for a tree preservation order before the coach excursions start arriving” – Kev Dwyer.

If you have any, please send letters to the.boss@theguardian.com. Today’s prizeless letter o’ the day is … Nigel Sanders. Terms and conditions for our competitions, when we run them, are here.

TIME TO SAY (MORE) GOODBYES

It’s not just Guardiola who will be waving a teary farewell this weekend. There’s quite a list of big-name departures around the Premier League. Andy Robertson and Mohamed Salah are the notable two saying ta-ra at Liverpool, with Salah seemingly doing his utmost to take Arne Slot out of Anfield with him. Over in Manchester, Bernardo Silva and John Stones will join their manager in bringing down the curtain on glittering City careers. Casemiro will be able to hit the beach in double-quick time after his last game for Manchester United down at Brighton. Andoni Iraola’s final act as head coach for Bournemouth will be a very important one, with a win at Nottingham Forest possibly enough to take them into Bigger Cup if other results go their way. What a parting gift that would be for fans and his successor, Marco Rose. You want more send-offs? OK, Oliver Glasner will take his last league match as Crystal Palace manager – which could be a glorified game of three-and-in against champions Arsenal – as he prepares his team for the Tin Pot final next Wednesday. Séamus Coleman will end his 78-year Everton playing career and, probably the biggest goodbye this weekend, will be one of Tottenham or West Ham falling through the Premier League trapdoor marked Do One.

RECOMMENDED SUBSCRIBING

With the Geopolitics World Cup steaming into view, why not sign up to the World Behind the Cup: a newsletter about more than football. But please do still stick with your faithful Football Daily too.

NEWS, BITS AND BOBS

Manchester United have confirmed the appointment of Michael Carrick as permanent head coach on a two-year contract. “Now it’s time to move forward together again, with ambition and a clear sense of purpose,” he honked. “[The club] and our incredible supporters deserve to be challenging for the biggest honours again.”

Álvaro Arbeloa has confirmed that he will leave Real Madrid at the end of the season, with José Mourinho set to party like it’s 2010 all over again by succeeding him.

Roberto De Zerbi has defended Cristian Romero after the Spurs captain chose to fly to Argentina for treatment instead of being with the squad before their crunch survival clash with Everton. “With me he showed always his desire to stay with us,” he blathered. “He is [knacked]. I’m not stupid. If I understand there is any player who thinks for himself before the club, I can’t be the same Roberto. But with Romero I can’t say nothing because with me he has been correct from when I started until now.”

Middlesbrough boss Kim Hellberg may consider penning a future best-seller after a breathless first season culminated in Spygate and now the Championship playoff final. “It’s been up and downs and a roller coaster, and a welcome to England that’s been special,” he deadpanned. “They told me I have some chapters in my book about this year to write later on.”

Mikel Merino has lifted the lid on his five-month recovery from foot-knack as he begins training again before Arsenal’s Bigger Cup final. “I had two options, to go down and cry myself to extinction or keep my head up [and] be positive,” he cooed. “The mobility scooter was a fun way to see the sun and enjoy time with the dog because I couldn’t walk for two months. It was a hard time on crutches.”

Union Berlin have appointed Mauro Lustrinelli as their boss after he led Thun to the Swiss league title. The 50-year-old Swiss replaces interim head coach Marie-Louise Eta, who made history in April when she became the first woman to lead a men’s Bundesliga team.

And Rafa Benítez is set to be bundled through the Panathinaikos door marked kάντε ένα after slumping to a six-game winless run at the end of the season.

STILL WANT MORE?

Prepare yourself for the next few weeks’ conversational ice-breakers with our pictorial player-by-player guide to Thomas Tuchel’s England squad.

Hull City owner Acun Ilicali tells Will Unwin: “People think I changed coaches because of ego. It was lack of ego.”

Before his Liverpool farewell, Andy Robertson gets his chat on with Andy Hunter about the highs and lows of his remarkable Anfield career. And here’s Andy on the driven, outspoken and inspiring Mohamed Salah, before his emotional exit.

Cup upsets are rare in Germany, particularly upsets where Bayern Munich are the victims, but Bayer Uerdingen pulled off a shock for the ages in 1985 when they toppled FC Hollywood in the DFB-Pokal final. Andy Martin tells the story.

Bullying, hazing and the making of a ‘soccer president’: Pablo Iglesias Maurer looks into Donald Trump’s forgotten career on the pitch.

And for one last time until August: 10 things to look out for in the Premier League season this weekend.

MEMORY LANE

22 June 2006: Theo Walcott, who had only recently turned 17, was the surprise pick in Sven-Göran Eriksson’s squad for the 2006 World Cup, when England were knocked out by Portugal on penalties in the quarter-finals. Did Walcott play in the tournament? Nope. Despite this, Eriksson defended his decision and said the experience would benefit the teenager in the future. He helped host the England squad announcement show on the FA app earlier, so maybe Eriksson was right.

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