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CLARETS AND BLUE

When Scott Parker led Burnley out of the Championship and into the Premier League last season, he did so with a side showcasing the kind of defensive resilience more readily associated with a medieval fortress, although with more expensive haircuts and less reliance on cauldrons of boiling oil. His team lost just two of their 46 matches, were unbeaten at home, kept a quite remarkable 30 clean sheets and notched up a combined total of 20 1-0 wins and scoreless draws. So while attending one of their games was about as exciting as reading an air-fryer instruction manual, they were devastatingly resolute. To nobody’s great surprise, they were immediately installed as the white-hot favourites to go straight back down before a ball had even been kicked.

Fast forward nearly nine months and the Burnley fortress has been repeatedly bombarded and breached, its ramparts razed to the ground and left in so many piles of smouldering rubble after proving little or no match for the preposterously-expensive Premier League siege-engines. Already consigned to the drop, the Clarets have won just four top-flight matches this season while conceding goals at a rate of two a game. On Thursday morning, the club announced that Parker had left the club despite having a year left on his contract. “[Scott] and the board held discussions and mutually agreed that his time at Turf Moor would conclude,” droned a statement. “The club would like to place on record its sincere thanks to Scott for his professionalism, dedication and contribution. He leaves with the respect and gratitude of everyone connected with Burnley football club.” A member of Parker’s staff, Michael Jackson, has been appointed interim head coach and will oversee the remaining steps of Burnley’s moonwalk back into the Championship.

“It has been an immense privilege to lead this great club over the past two years,” parped Parker, who has now masterminded three promotions and two relegations during a six-year career as a head coach. “I have enjoyed every moment of our journey together, but feel that now is the right time for both parties to move in a different direction.” While the direction one of those will move in is already set in stone, Parker’s future looks far less certain. He is unlikely to emulate his predecessor by being being handed the reins of an elite European super-club – or even Chelsea – as his reward for promoting and then relegating Burnley across two seasons. An undeniably excellent Championship manager, he has yet to earn his Premier League stripes despite his penchant for wearing Thom Browne 4-Bar jackets on the touchline. Indeed, given his undeniable knack for getting teams promoted from the Championship, Parker seems like the ideal candidate for the recently vacated Burnley job.

LIVE ON BIG WEBSITE

Join Daniel Harris from 8pm BST for hot Bigger Vase coverage from Nottingham Forest 1-1 Aston Villa, while Taha Hashim will also be on deck for updates from Shakhtar Donetsk 0-0 Crystal Palace in the Tin Pot semis.

QUOTE OF THE DAY

“From Sefton Road to Vicarage Road to Villa Park to Wembley to Old Trafford to San Siro back to Villa Park to Goodison Park and finally to Portman Road. It’s been some journey that I only dreamt of as a boy! But with this dream there has to be an ending and Saturday might be the last game of my professional career – 23 years and OUT!” – Ashley Young, 73, calls time on his career, but could bow out on a high should Ipswich secure promotion again on Saturday.

FOOTBALL DAILY LETTERS

I read with interest that David Brent School of Management’s Glenn Hoddle was fishing for the Tottenham job (yesterday’s Quote of the Day). Is that a sign of how far Spurs have fallen, or was he trying to pay for sins in a prior life?” – Neale Redington.

Can I point out Football Daily’s arrogance in dismissing the entertainment value of a proper match (sans £ billions), in which the mighty Vale handed out a schoolin’ to the resurgent Stockport County on a sunny evening in Edgeley (yesterday’s Football Daily)? I haven’t watched the pompfest in foreign climes you referenced, but it couldn’t have been a patch on what Pep Guardiola was fortunate enough to choose” – John Timmins.

Your reader Ken Muir’s observation that Hearts teams are sweeping all before them this season (yesterday’s Football Daily letters), brings to mind an old chestnut. An Englishman goes into a pub in Edinburgh and asks a local: ‘What colour do Hearts play in?’ ‘It’s maroon …’ comes the answer. ‘Thank you! I’ll have a gin and tonic please!’ And I’ll get my coat …” – Allastair McGillivray.

If you have any, please send letters to the.boss@theguardian.com. Today’s letter o’ the day winner is … Neale Redington, who gets a copy of Classic Football Shirts, courtesy of Penguin. It’s out on Thursday and you can order a copy here if you’re not successful. Terms and conditions for our competitions, when we run them, are here. 

RECOMMENDED VIEWING

Get your eyeballs on Michael Butler as he bathes himself in the vaults of the Manchester-based Classic Football Shirts retailer.

RECOMMENDED LISTENING

Football Weekly Extra? Football Weekly Extra!

GUNS BLAZING

If Tuesday’s Bigger Cup feast between PSG and Bayern was an extremely high-end, high-speed version of the best playground game you’ve ever played in, it was strangely reassuring to see the other semi-final also live up to stereotype, filling up the bingo card for teams and games involving Diego Simeone and Mikel Arteta. All goals from set pieces: tick. Sh1thousery around penalty decisions: tick. VAR flare-ups: tick. Premier League exceptionalism: tick. Both teams had cause to complain about the soft penalties that were given – and thumpingly converted – in Wednesday’s 1-1 draw at the Metropolitano, David Hancko clumsily nudging over Viktor Gyökeres in a classic “I’ve seen them not given” challenge, and Ben White seeing (and knowing little about) the ball being thwacked against his slightly outstretched hand from close range. But it was the spot-kick that ultimately wasn’t awarded that caused all The Discourse, with Hancko seeming to transgress again in a challenge that brought down Eberechi Eze with 12 minutes remaining.

Referee Danny Makkelie, having pointed to the spot, then seemed consumed with existential self-doubt as he consulted his TV monitor. After poring over it at least 12 times in search of the clear and obvious error that VAR was brought in to correct, Makkelie reverse-ferreted and denied Arsenal their spot-kick. “It’s a clear penalty,” fumed Declan Rice afterwards. “And I don’t know how that’s not been given. I think the fans provoked the decision and changed the ref’s mind. Uefa is totally different [to the Premier League]. In both boxes, you have to be so careful because they give absolutely everything.” Though not quite everything, evidently. Arteta meanwhile declared himself “incredibly fuming”. The neutrals at least got the talking points they’d tuned in to see, setting up a mouthwatering post-match presser next Tuesday. Who knows, it might even be preceded by a decent game of football.

NEWS, BITS AND BOBS

If you’re in certain European countries you’ll be able to watch men’s Bigger Cup action alongside The Bear and Zootropolis 2 after Disney+ secured live rights to matches for the first time.

Leicester will finish bottom of the WSL after a 7-0 shoeing at Arsenal, who are keeping the heat on leaders Manchester City in the title race.

Uruguay midfielder Giorgian de Arrascaeta is a doubt for the Geopolitics World Cup after fracturing his collarbone during Flamengo’s 1-1 draw at Estudiantes.

Kobbie Mainoo has marked the rediscovery of his existence by Manchester United under Michael Carrick by inking his autograph on a new contract, tying him to the club until 2031. “I have grown up seeing the impact that our club has on our city, and I relish the responsibility that comes with wearing this shirt,” he cheered. “I have the privilege of living my dream every day, with the same desire to succeed as when I joined my first training session at the age of six.”

And Coventry owner Doug King is confident Frank Lampard’s Coventry will remain Frank Lampard’s Coventry for next season’s Premier League return, despite rumours linking the Sky Blues boss with a move back to Chelsea. Lampard is one of a number of names linked with the poisoned chalice hot seat, including Xabi Alonso, Andoni Iraola and Marco Silva, but King is confident their man is happy. “Of course [I want to keep him],” he tooted. “Frank knows how I think of him. He is a very skilled operator, and he has taken and developed our team to the Championship title with no parachute payments. Everybody wants what they want, and I will look at the situation, and I hope he will be with us into the next adventure that we have taken in the Premier League, because I think he enjoys working in that environment.”

MOVING THE GOALPOSTS

Suzanne Wrack looks at the legacy left by the retiring Millie Bright in this extract from our sister email’s latest edition.

STILL WANT MORE?

The $13bn GWC. A deep and revealing dive into the most lucrative sporting event ever staged, by Matt Hughes.

From national pride to fascism: Jonathan Wilson examines how countries have used the World Cup to build identity.

Endrick gets his chat on with Thiago Rabelo about Brazil, his baby and Jude Bellingham, saying: “Football isn’t a nice place.”

Captain. Leader. Far-right sympathiser. John Terry and footballers’ internet radicalisation. By Jonathan Liew.

David Segar looks ahead to the impending Liverpool rebuild.

Atlético’s manic man in black is the personification of their longing to be back in the Bigger Cup final, writes Sid Lowe.

PSG and Bayern’s box-fresh talents or Premier League title tussle: here’s Barney Ronay on why you can only have one.

And before Thursday night’s Midlands affair, Will Unwin picks over some other all-English European semi-finals.

MEMORY LANE

Shakhtar Donetsk have tasted European glory once before – winning Big Vase in May 2009, beating Werder Bremen in extra time. For those fans that couldn’t make it to the final in Istanbul, they descended on to the bars of Donetsk, and it’s fair to say that this gentleman was pleased with the result.

‘THE ASHTRAY SAYS YOU WERE UP ALL NIGHT’