On Late Night, Seth Meyers noted that in Trump‘s first year of his second term his family made about $4bn, an “insane” figure that was “not even from doing anything” other than government contracts, shady crypto deals and memecoins.
Recently, a 91-storey Trump tower on Australia’s Gold Coast was scrapped after it was decided that the Trump brand is “increasingly toxic” in the country.
Meyers said that means a lot as “everything there is toxic”.
He said as he is loathed overseas, it’s a “perfect time for the president to fly to China” before playing footage of his welcome, which included a group of children dancing and cheering.
Trump remarked on how beautiful the children were and, in character, Meyers joked: “The last time I saw so many young and beautiful children greet a plane, it was on an island.”
He has also been joined by his son Eric, to which Meyers said: “Just imagine the rightwing freakout if Hunter Biden had gone with Joe on a trip to China.”
He said he would be better company as “the guy knows how to party”.
Trump also arrived with an “entourage of American CEOs” including Elon Musk who Meyers said would need to “project dignity and poise” something he failed at instantly with footage of him acting strangely at a party then played.
“The fuck are you doing, dude?” Meyers asked, saying he looked “like an eight-year-old who’s ruining the family Christmas card”.
Trump was aiming to stand up to Xi Jinping after years of calling out China for how the US has been treated yet the president said many fawning comments including how it was an “honor” to be the leader’s friend.
“What happened to standing up to China?” Meyers asked.
His arrival was mocked across China online and state censors have been allowing comments to go viral.
“Internet memes and posts are hardly behind Trump’s back. They’re mocking him where he’s most likely to see it,” he said.
Meyers said, as Americans struggle to get by, all Trump cares about it “flattery, fanfare and self-enrichment” overseas.
Stephen Colbert
On the Late Show, Stephen Colbert also spoke about Trump’s triptoBeijing, joking about Trump and Xi’s “inspiring display of hyper-masculine hand dominance” as they shared an extended awkward handshake.
Colbert warned that Xi “might catch a case of five-day-old banana hand” if he isn’t careful.
He also played footage of the welcoming committee of excited children, saying: “Those kids are so happy … that they got the day off from the iPhone factory.”
He added: “that joke is based on a true story … that I read on my iPhone.”
The visit also saw Trump say how much he respected the Chinese leader, adding that he only says the truth. Colbert joked that it was his “one billionth lie”.
While many members of the press were there to cover, a CBS journalist failed to get a visa in time and had to cover from Taiwan instead.
Colbert said that it fits into the CBS slogan: “When events happen, we’re at most one country away.”
This week also saw Kyle Diamantas become the new acting head of the FDA. Colbert expressed concern, saying, “he’s not a doctor, he’s obscure and he’s named Kyle”.
He said he didn’t trust a Kyle to run the FDA and only wants a Kyle to “run me a standup paddleboard”.
The title was announced after previous head Marty Makary wouldn’t approve fruit-flavored vapes for Trump.
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